As some of you know, I teach kindergarten. The following is just a smattering of some conversations from this school year…this class is great for fodder. Enjoy!
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Student A: Wouldn’t it be great to go visit Santa?
Student B: Yeah. I bet he’s really nice.
Student C: It would be so cool to be an elf. Like, if you lived with Santa.
Student D (who happens to be Jewish): [sigh] I WISH I was Santa’s son.
Students A, B and C: Yeah…
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Boy-When I’m tall, I want to be a police officer.
Me-Really? You’re going to have to be really brave for that job. That’s a great goal.
Boy-Well, either that, or Superman.
Me-Superman? Really?…..
Girl-You know, Superman and all those guys only live in Marvel Comics.
Me-….
Later that week:
Same boy-So, I’m going to be a police officer when I’m big.
Me-I know! It’s exciting! You told me earlier.
Boy-And when I lose my job, I’m going to be a fire fighter.
Me-Um, why are you going to lose your job?
Boy-I don’t know, doesn’t everyone?
Me-….
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Girl A-Do you wanna hear something weird?
Me-Yes. Always.
Girl A-Cows drink milk and then they pee.
Me-Well, yes, technically that’s true. They do drink their mamma’s milk, and they also pee.
Girl B-Yes. APPARENTLY, cows pee fresh milk.
Me-Well, THAT’S not technically true.
Girls A and B-No it is!
Me-…..
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After explaining the egg drop project (they are to create a container that they can put a raw egg in and drop it off the roof of the classroom and have it remain intact) to my kindergartners, YET AGAIN:
Student: Um, I don’t have any of those.
Me: Any of what?
Student: Those kinds of eggs.
Me: Oh, you don’t have any chicken eggs? (Thinking, well sure, we could have vegan families, surprised we haven’t run into that before)
Student: No, I have chicken eggs. But any of them that I drop off the roof are going to break. I don’t have any at my house that won’t break.
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During a conversation about oviparous (egg laying) animals:
Students: DINOSAURS LAID EGGS???
Me: Yes. Scientists believe at least most dinosaurs did based on fossilized findings. (Where’s Ross when I need him??)
Girl: What did they look like?
Me: Well, I don’t think we’re sure because there are no pictures.
Boy: My mom knows what they look like.
Me: Really? How?
Boy: My mom saw them.
Me: Really? How?
Boy: Well, mostly because she was alive when the dinosaurs were alive.
Me: Well, I’m not really sure about that, but let’s move on.
TECHNICALLY, Superman is from the DC comic universe, not Marvel.
I will for sure let her know that!