Picture me, snuggled on the couch with my glass of wine, Facebook on the laptop so I can discuss why my kid is asking (literally, “timeout Mama?”) for timeouts (I’m sure this will be a post in the near future) ready to watch the first episode of the newest season of The Biggest Loser. Brian looks over at me and says, “So have you noticed? The tree has one of those spiderwebs all over it that you would call gorgeous…”
Now I know what you’re thinking…”Does she realize it’s January 4th?¹ Why would she still have her Christmas tree up, decorated, with lights on and all????” Yes she does, but she just drove back from LA after flying back yesterday from Maui after a week’s vacation, which was preceded by five days in LA, all with a two year old. (And I hate talking in the third person, so I really wish you wouldn’t make me do that.) So I was leaving it up for ONE MORE NIGHT and taking it down tomorrow.
So I say, “Really?” And get up to take a look. Well it is gorgeous. And HUGE. And covering my Willow Tree Angel of Teaching, Luke’s first Christmas ornament, and our giant Mickey Mouse hat with ears holiday ornament we bought during our first trip to Disneyland this Thanksgiving. So I take a closer look and think about how long it’s going to take me to go in and around the webbing so I don’t disrupt whatever created it to retrieve our belongings from the tree (real of course, cut down from the Tree Farm which would have been a post I would have linked to here had I had a blog then) which is when I realize it’s bigger than I originally thought and has gnats in it. I think, well at least they are there stuck in the webbing instead of flying over the house because minutes before getting snuggled on the couch I had found our back door had been left open a crack by a Realtor and Client coming to see the house to give us false hope earlier this week (because remember, we just arrived home today). Then I notice the gnats are moving, and I think, they really should be stuck to the web…yeah, you’re right. They’re not gnats. They are BABY SPIDERS that hatched in my Christmas tree sometime during the almost two weeks that we were away.
Needless to say, Brian’s “Christmas” came a day early, and we carefully removed ornaments (saved the Mickey ears) and literally ran the tree out of the house, ripped the lights off of it and ran back in the house and shook ourselves silly…when I tried to do Brian the favor of vacuuming (or Dysoning as it is in our house) up all the pine needles, he looked at me like I had just received a lobotomy and said, and I quote, “Oh no you DON’T take my Christmas away!”
Stay tuned for what I learned in 2011 next, provided Charlotte and her babies stay outside tomorrow…
¹ Author’s note: this just exemplifies how long it has taken me to get this blog up and running.